Growin' Up

On Saturday my friends and I celebrated the 30th birthday of one of our good friends. As he is the first in our circle to watch the odometer roll over he is a little anxious about being alone in near-middle age. Of course in three months the remainder of the Class of '95 will begin to topple like dominoes so we can all together wallow in abject wheredowegofromhere. Which is very appropriate since, like everyone else in this little digital realm of ours, I constantly focus on four things:

1. Me.
2. The lack of sex in my sex life.
3. The lack of female persons in my personal life.
4. And, the recession of my youth.

The last item being something that a few of my cohorts and I enjoy talking about regularly since we are all suffering from the some condition; aging. It's not as if some switch is thrown the instant one turns 30, but there are noticeable changes (whether they be sometime before or sometime after that day) that are ultimately associated with one's third decade. I have recently discovered, at least for me, some important rules to the new 30 Paradigm.

Exercise. If you work out and are not doing it four to five days a week, you are wasting your time. Yeah, it takes twice as long now to recover from serious physical strain but it also takes three times as long to metabolize all of the carbs I can't stop eating. Listen to Yoda, "Do or do not. There is no try."

Running game. 30 is approcahing something like mature sexy. At least that is what I hear (or depserately hope for). The point is that at around 30 you can confidently get away with things you could not as when you were younger. Specifically going in dead cold, no introductions, to a group of women at a social event and simply saying "hi, my name is ----" actually works. At 23 you didn't have the ocnifdence to pull it off. At 30 you don't give a fuck anymore, you know what you want.

Owning property. You either do or you do not. If you haven't bought anything by now you are not going to unless circumstances drastically change for you. And that's just fine. Sign another 12-month lease and let everyone else sweat the interest rate hikes.

Mug Night at Whitlow's. It 's out of the question, just let it go. There are plenty of other options.

Work. If you are at all career-oriented, these are your Hall of Fame years. You are experienced enough to do just about anything but young enough (corporately-speaking) to keep accelerating your advancement. Now's the time to make your name and then you can ride it out through your 40's into early retirement.

Rock. You still can.