Thursday, March 23, 2006

The End

Well my 3 weeks is up and what started as a fling, grew into something more, and ended as a fling is officially over. After knowingly getting involved with someone I knew was going to be moving awayI find myself staring out into the future once again wondering what the hell it is I am doing with my life. It was a strange set of circumstances, these past few weeks, where I would off-and-on experience little flashes of meaningful relationship potential while knowing that it was fleeting and merely a glimpse of better things out there. It drove me nuts at times and in other moments was incredible. (I think I'm becoming a believer in the philosophies of dualism.)

Stirring up your emotions so radically and in such a short period of time leaves you disoriented but in a way makes you more cognizant of and excited about what is out there. I've certainly been shaken from the static grind of what I've been up to for the last year or so. I'm uneasy about where I will end up in the next few months (residentially, occupationally, and existentially speaking) but I feel envigorated knowing change is on the horizon. Of course it all could turn out to be a huge disaster but I doubt it. I've lived a fairly charmed life up until this point and I'm pretty sure that I'm in the black when it comes to my positive karma levels.

This post really isn't going anywhere other than serving as an opportunity for me to gush/vent. Let me conclude by saying that I cannot wait for Opening Day. Spring, rebirth, and all makes sense.


At 3/24/2006 5:23 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

sorry dude. That's a bummer. Good luck with that existential thing.


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