Friday 8-Track

The Guilty Pleasures Workout Mix. These are the tracks that I maaaaaay be listening to at the gym and hoping no one else can hear.

Kenny Loggins - "Nobody's Fool" - Caddyshack II: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack

That's right, the lesser known theme song to the horrible, horrible Caddyshack sequel. It's a bad song with a lot of 80's production value but it's got a decent hook and I actually think it's one of Loggins' better songs. Of course 'better' is a relative term since everything Kenny Loggins does sucks except for maybe "House on Pooh Corner" and like a minute of "Danny's Song."

Wheatus - "Teenage Dirtbag" - Wheatus

One of those silly dumb songs that kinda rocks. I like the Iron Maiden name-checking and all of the falsettoes. That's pretty much it.

Bon Jovi - "Raise Your Hands" - Slippery When Wet

Let's face facts kids, Richie Sambora can play. His style is cheesey and derivative and not too different from anyone else in that era but the guy has got chops. This is a fun track for anyone who has a hard-on for pinch-harmonics, dive-bombs, and any of that other cock rockin' crap. You know you liked this album at some point...un-ironically, I might add.

New Edition - "Candy Girl" - Candy Girl

What can I say?

Lita Ford - "Kiss Me Deadly" - Lita

Certainly a departure from her teenage days with The Runaways, I like this stuff better. I used to get really worked up for this video. A hot chic in spandex and a thong writhing around and ripping off some pretty decent guitar riffs was about all my adolescent libido could handle.

Akinyele - "Put It In Your Mouth" - Put It In Your Mouth [EP]

I'm sorry but this song puts me in hysterics everytime I hear it. I think it should be difficult for someone to get too upset about this song. It is so over-the-top in its misogynism that you cannot take it seriously.

Phil Collins - "Sussudio" - No Jacket Required

Synthesized bass, lots of horns, nonsensical lyrics, what more do you for cheesey pop hit? I would go but it would only pale in comparison to Brett Easton Ellis' analysis.

Wilson Phillips - "Hold On" - Wilson Phillips

Seriously, I am not gay.